The New Regimen

Here at chez headache, we're instituting a new schedule: regular hours!

I know this unorthodox approach will concern, even frighten some of you, but frankly, I'm getting pretty desperate. The headaches that have plagued me for years are here in force in the past couple of months, appearing nearly every day and resisting most pain medications. (They do seem susceptible to a combo of pain medication and alcohol, but that's hardly a good coping strategy at 10 in the morning.) In an effort to bring these things back into some kind of control, I'm doing the unthinkable: turning the lights off at midnight and getting up at 8:30. For those of you unfamiliar with the Gardner/Smith schedule, this is a big shift. Travis, horrified, has agreed to live by this schedule for a week so that I can get used to the hours, but makes no promises after that. This has put a real crimp in his usual 4 a.m. work time!

I've been seeing an acupuncturist for more than a year for these headaches, but we haven't managed to really touch them. As well as acupuncture, though, she has me doing a number of other things to try to control the situation. Many of these fall in the category of "detoxing." Frankly, a lot of this seems like so much mumbo-jumbo to me, but I'm pretty much willing to try anything. Here's what I'm supposed to be doing everyday:

• Taking GI Flora at waking and going to bed
  
• Taking a multi-vitamin and vitamin B at breakfast
  
• Taking three magnesium pills a day, with food
  
• Taking three vitamin c pills a day, with food
  
• Not eating cottage cheese, milk, grapes, or tomatoes
  
• Eating more of cruciferous vegetables: cauliflower, kale, bok choy, broccoli, etc. Steamed, preferably.
  
• Using organic meat and vegetables
  
• Eating more soy. (Soy is a food?! Go figure.)
  
• Having 1 tablespoon of ground flax and pumpkin seeds on some days, and ground sesame and sunflower seeds on others
  
• Using castor oil packs every night
  
• Ending my showers by standing in cool/cold water (This one is sooo hard.)
  
• Starting tomorrow, taking various liquids under the tongue three times a day

Needless to say, I'm supposed to be exercising, drinking lots of water, etc.

Can I just say how much fun all of this is? Whoo!